Big Sex Mistakes Men & Women Do

Dec 2009 - Sexology

Men & Women are always blaming each other if they are not having their Best Sex in the bedroom. There are things men and women don’t like their partner doing. And they just wish if their partner could understand. You could always hear Men saying: She’s not always ready to go and Ladies saying: Maybe he’s just feeling fat. Well we all have mixed gender signals on exactly what their partner wants in the bedroom.

Ladies first so let’s discuss further the sex mistakes women most often make: Wo m e n don’t w why men don’t like to cuddle.

Men : After sex, men return to their normal non-horny state, but women only return to a semi-aroused state. Our bodies are completely different than each other in how they react so you should totally put in mind that. For instance, after a guy gets to this state, a system shutdown occurs. Men prefer passing out while women want to cuddle, feel the warmth; it is like they are connecting. Women just view men as “they got what they wanted” and insensitive. But they aren’t it is just they are not emotional like us. Women tend to be more sensitive. Try to look at it differently like you exhausted him. Haha Tigress!

Women don’t really get how it feels for a man to be out of shape or over weight and how this affects his sexual performance. Men: We actually have the same concern or fear like women in terms of shape. We don’t like to be seen naked too if we aren’t in shape. Yes, we feel unattractive! Also, when men are stressed out anything; like financial or work problems, it leads to a a turnoff. Men are put under pressure that they have to satisfy women and satisfying a woman sexual desire isn’t that easy. And a man needs to satisfy it to boost his ego. Women expect a lot from men in bed, as women are creative and adventurous. They often expect men to be mind readers rather than telling them what they really want and like. But men don’t know what it takes to satisfy you; you must let him know your needs. Women think that men are ready to have sex anywhere, anytime. Men: We do but not always. But not every time a girls looks at us; we drool. But it is different when we get into a relationship; we tend to unfortunately get bored. It is like we want to experience it with someone else. Not that we will but it is a thought.

Women don’t know how men could distinguish simply between love and sex. Men: The reason why women can’t separate love and sex. It’s like a combo for them. One of the reasons is that during sex, women produce oxytocin, a hormone that strengthens emotional connection. This is why women get emotionally attached when it comes to sex and could get emotionally attached when being engaged in casual sex but for men they produce a very little amount of oxytocin if not none and you can easily have sex without any kind of emotional commitment. Men suppose that women have inferior sexual desire than men.

Women: Men think always that they are stronger than women. And of course they think of it the same way in terms of sex. Men think they have a stronger sexual drive and desire than women do, but this isn’t true. We all have sexual needs and desires; not because they are leaders that mean that they have a high sexual desire than us. That is because our body is different; our sex drive is just less constant unlike men they feel that they want it all the time. Women get more emotionally attached when it comes to sex. Men are simply aroused by the thought of sex as for women it is the warmth of sex; the feeling.

Men assume that all women want romance, a commitment, a relationship; not fun or a one night stand. Women: If you asked a man what do you think women want in bed? They will tell you they are looking for romance & commitment. Women could be devil in bed. We are not always angelic as men view us. Women can be just as naughty as men. It is just that we don’t talk about it as men. In a matter of fact, we fantasize more than men.

Men assume that women expect them to execute like porn stars. Women: Men mistakenly believe that porn sex is for real. What you see on TV is not close to reality, the moaning, and the groaning. And the closer the camera gets the images get bigger. Hehe. So, this isn’t the norm. Men in porn are chosen because they aren’t the norm. We don’t really want it BIG hehe! We would be in Mars. If we want a porn star we would’ve gone for one. We like change but not every time, that doesn’t strike us if we actually do a new or a different position each time. What really pleases a woman is a guy that knows what he’s doing down there and the effort put into it.

Men assume that if they’re ready for sex, she’s ready for sex. Women: Our bodies react differently; men get aroused much quicker; but women take their time. We are not like them it takes a man 2-5 minutes for a quickie as for women the shortest is 20 minutes. And not just that, we need time to get warmed up for sex so we’re physically prepared for it. Foreplay isn’t an option; it’s a prerequisite for women! Women are different so add 20 minutes of foreplay.

Why Do Women Have Trouble Reaching Orgasm

Dec 2009 - Sexology

Our mission in this article is to help you reach the climax; therefore there are two things you need to believe in: The first fact is that you can’t depend on your guy to get you to the state of orgasm. And, that you will reach your first orgasm through masturbation; in fact. Masturbation is critical, not just for having your first orgasm. The second thing is that you have to know how to orgasm because it isn’t easy for women to reach such a state. The more you get to know about your body and the more you practice the more it feels good. And, the more you masturbate, the easier the orgasm becomes. Now you know how it works; no we need to get you into the action.

Do you really know what orgasm is really about? I am not talking about what you saw in porn movies or love scenes in the movies, where orgasms are "Oh My God .. You’re So Good … Aaaaaah .. ooouh" hysterically theatrical, some women view orgasms to be extremely dramatic than they actually are. Let’s describe how it is, if you have felt a build up of pressure with contractions at the peak, you might already be having orgasms but just small ones. The good news is, you can boost the strength of your orgasms by doing Kegel exercises as they’ increase the muscle control and it makes you experience higher levels of arousal before letting go. Find below the list of procedures that you need to know to reach such a state.

Discover Your Body: You have to take a closer look at your body. Of course you know how men and women have different bodies; men genitals are out there for him to look at, but ours are hidden. So, use a hand mirror and take a closer look at your genitals. Look for your clitoris. Your most sexual sensation begins there thus, the more you familiarize yourself with, the more orgasmic you’ll become.

Are you in the mood for it? In order to reach such a state of arousal, you have to really be in the mood for it and really really really want it. Most importantly you need to clear your mind from any negative thoughts like this isn’t right. I look like a dumb ass; I am not sexy for it etc. I am sure that you really know how negative we could get. So get rid of these killing thoughts because as long as these thoughts are on your mind you’ll not get any closer to experience that state. Not only men think with their dicks; women have a powerful sex organ too that is the brain; so you need to clean your head prior to let your body react.

What do you feel about sex? How do you perceive sex? Did your parents tell you shouldn’t do this or that it is wrong or bad etc.. Well most of them do; they will tell you not to touch yourself. Haha etc. This stuff really influence how we look at sex and you didn’t feel comfy touching yourself under and I bet that you feel that what you’re doing isn’t the best thing or scared to get caught. But as you age you will still feel uncomfortable about it, try normalizing it by calling any sexual act by another name. Using another word will help you to not think it is bad and can make it less intimidating. Try calling sex as “having fun, making love, etc.” and masturbating “pampering myself,” for instance.

Don’t be concerned when you feel the pressure building. Well if it is your first time; you will feel frightened about it. But don’t be. You’ll feel pressure is building and all of this is because lots of blood is pumping to your genital and clitoral area. An orgasm is simply the moment when your body releases the blood back into the body, which feels ecstatic. So don’t scare yourself; just ease yourself to it.

What if it doesn’t work? Our previous experiences haunt us always even if we don’t remember them. They still influence you. Maybe you’ll need to see a sex therapist for that. If this isn’t the case for it to not work; use a lubricant on the inside parts of your labia or on your fingers and find your clitoris. Try gently stroking near or around it with your middle finger or the pads of a couple of fingers. Try it out in different speed and intensity. Be patient.

Don’t lose hope If it’s not working, try another position and concentrate on enjoying any sexual feelings you are experiencing instead of concentrating and thinking I must have an orgasm. The harder you try, the further away it will seem.

Get the right tools It doesn’t stop over there. In order to complete the program, you’ll also need the right tools to get there. Are you shy about sex-toy shopping and have no idea what things are? Then, you need to start by learning about them b; just browse the internet to educate yourself about what’s what. But don’t forget to acquaint yourself first with your body meaning that you’ll need to masturbate with your fingers first, leaving the toys later.

Add other turn-ons Fantasize in your head about something that turns you on, or something you’d love to do. Read a book on sex ideas etc. Just note that your first orgasm may take ages to experience; but once you do you’ll experience it effortlessly and quicker so go get it. Cheers!